Melancholy

Hi everyone it’s been so long since i blogged. The past four months of 2017 has been nothing but a rollercoaster of events, filled with ups and downs but i would say maybe more downs then ups? but nevertheless, we have all made it through the difficult phases the past few months and we can only become stronger than before am i right?

At the start of the year, specifically, 25th Jan i fell down in school and fractured my feet. What was thought initially as a sprain turned out to be a hairline fracture. It was one of the most painful and mentally, physically, emotionally draining experience i had and i know i should count myself lucky that the condition was not serious and i have it better than many other people but still, at that point in time, the only thing i could think of was “why me?” “why did i choose to go for pe that day when i knew my leg was already injured?” 😦 sometimes i questions the choices i make in life man. If only i didnt exert my leg i would be able to train with the rest, go for trainings, play for a division, get to experience what i have been looking forward to since j1. this sucks. after 2 months or so i am almost completely okay already and im really thankful. really glad to have my buddy and my family and friends who took the effort to care and show their concern during this period of time. There were many times where i felt lonely and frustrated too but i guess it became better because  of the people who cared, especially my family really.

School hasnt been the best. It was getting back the past week but my fucking asshole chem tutor had to screw it up for me by embarrassing me in front of the whole class. I swear. It isnt even the first time anymore like sure i know it was my fault i did not study but that does not give you the rights to slash me with such harsh words especially in front of the whole class. Like what kind of fucking tutor are you when you didnt show a least bit of concern when i fractured my leg. I hate the whole world man really fucking done. The next time he does this i am seriously going to rebut back and not let him put me down like this. Fucking unfair. Stupid piece of shit man.

So because i cant play for matches, i became the umpire/ linesmen and am still part of the team. Really grateful for this fact so. Was really interesting and exciting watching them play and honestly, i feel like tennis people are one of the blessings in disguise in mj. They are fun and kind and easy going and everyone in here is literally so easy to talk to and i feel so much more comfortable being around them than my classmates. We lost against AC and DHS so far but i guess its the experience that counts? and they put up a good fight so wuhu.

Lastly, because my leg was injured, the only thing i could basically do is study. so i tried putting more effort into studying and improving my grades but to no avail lmao.

i got an e for gp despite getting highest in class for compre, u for chem and math, s for geog and d for econs. felt super dejected for math because i did study for it idk maybe it has something to do with the way i study that is making me not getting good grades. pretty satisfied with geog because except one person the whole class got u. and econs is like hm okay. expected higher because i studied but then again not everyone did well so. gotta buck up for my chem and math lah i know. shall prove peter wrong man and shove it in his face. DIE BITCH DIE. ZZZZZZZ.

so overall, results are bad but they werent the worse i expected? u got this xs keep pushing yourself you are doing fine ok.

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